Friday, February 1, 2013

Yet another reason to scoff at conspiracy theories

Every so often one of my slightly less than sane acquaintances will regale me with tales of government conspiracies: President Kennedy was assassinated by the CIA, there are alien spaceships stashed in Area 51, the Bush administration was behind 9/11, FEMA is setting up concentration camps, and so on. I laugh at all of them. The federal government is capable of many things, but a successful conspiracy is not one of them. I've worked for the government. I know how thoroughly incompetent it can be. Yes, we got a lot of stuff right.Give the government some clearly defined tasks, and those tasks will be taken care of in a reasonably proficient manner.

On the other hand, there are gems like the one that landed in my In Box yesterday:

Coming Soon: Electronic 1099R Income and Tax Withholding Statement Later this year OPM will be asking annuitant and survivor beneficiaries to visit Services Online to opt-in to receive the Tax Year 2013 electronic 1099R. The Services Online website allows you to view and print your 1099R in electronic form instantly. Watch for more information in the coming months! In the meantime, if you haven't accessed Services Online lately, you may prepare for the upcoming online elections and check on your annuity status and so much more by going to www.servicesonline.opm.gov. Don't worry if you don't remember your password. You can request a new one from the main page of Services Online. If you have set up your security questions and have an email address on file, you may choose to receive your password by email. However, if you don't have an email address on file or haven't set up your security questions your password will be sent by mail. Unfortunately, Services Online is currently unavailable for use by persons OPM has approved as "Representative Payees" for annuitants and survivors. REMINDER: While in Services Online, please verify that your e-mail address is correct in order to receive updates throughout the year. If you have a valid email address and security questions set up within Services Online you will be able to receive your password changes via email.

If I don't have an email address on file, how do they expect me to receive the message?

Perhaps in a day or two a hard copy version of that message will appear in the snail mail box, but I'm not holding my breath waiting for it. 

3 comments:

Aquarians Love To Fuck said...

"......However, if you don't have an email address on file or haven't set up your security questions your password will be sent by mail......"

I'm more concerned that they started a sentence with the word "However". Noah Webster is turning in his grave.

Did you know that when Noah was compiling his dictionary of "How To Misspell Perfectly Good English Words" - like "labor" for "labour" and "color" for "colour" - he wanted to change the spelling of "women" to "wimmen"?
Fortunately, saner heads prevailed.

Sarge said...

I have no problem with court ordered surveillance of one's email. I want a warrent showing justifable cause first!
Here in Evansville, In - a major pot smuggler and his dealer here were arrested after the US Attorney got approval for a wire tap.

Sarge

BBC said...

I figure that in a few more years I won't have an email address, or give a shit that I don't have one.

And I won't give a fuck what wimmen and wordsmiths are doing either, I'll just be enjoying my warm and dry cave and not giving a fuck what the rest of the world is doing.